WITH neither party being
perfect, it is normal, even expected, for couples to engage in arguments.
However, given their reluctance to let go of the patriarchal outlook on life
that seems to confine women to a lower rung of life, certain men in the
Nigerian society seem to fly off the handle at the slightest prompting. They
subject women to physical and emotional torture following the slightest
perceived dissent. To such men, it is not just an affront for a woman to have a
contrary opinion to her husband’s, it is something close to treachery. This
warped outlook on life seems to have underlined the terrible case of a man who,
in a fit of madness, clubbed his own baby to death in Abeokuta, Ogun State,
recently. According to reports, a heated argument between a couple resident in
the Elega area of Abeokuta turned tragic when the husband, identified as
Olamide, mistakenly struck his one-year-old son with an iron rod intended for
his wife, leading to the child’s death!
As indicated in a video
from the scene, the man fled immediately after the incident. Residents of the
community said that they were alerted to the incident after they heard noise
from the couple’s apartment. A co-tenant identified as Bolatito said that she
was alerted by the wife that her husband had killed her son and when she got to
the scene, she learnt that the couple had engaged in a fight. As it turned out,
the suspect had reportedly picked an iron rod attached to the weight he often
lifted during exercises and attempted to smash it on his wife but the rod hit
the son on the head. She said: “At about midnight, I heard the lady calling out
to me that I should come to her aid and that Ola (husband) had killed Ayinde
(the son). I was surprised, and I asked what happened. She said I should help
them get a vehicle. I went outside and I couldn’t see anybody, so while I was
returning home, I saw some people with a vehicle, so I said that we should take
the child to Trinity because it is the nearby hospital in the area.
“When we got to Trinity,
we were informed that the child was dead. Upon returning home, we realised that
the child was making sounds, so we decided to take him to the hospital again,
where we were told that he had died the second time. What I learnt was that the
husband took an iron rod from a weight he often carried and attempted to smash
it on the wife, but instead hit the baby on the head. He had always beaten his
wife, as the previous pregnancy the wife had was lost due to the beating she
received from the husband.”
The story was corroborated
by the chairman of the community, Ramoni Adegbola. Adegbola said: “I heard the
noise of ‘help, help, they have started fighting!’, and I ran to the scene. On
getting there, I saw them with the child, and I was informed that the child had
been hit with an iron rod on the head. I called out to other residents to assist
in taking the child to hospital, and when they returned from the hospital, I
was informed that the child had died. The couple engaged in a fight frequently,
and I feel it’s because the husband often takes illicit drugs. There was a day
he took something and fainted, and I had to call on neighbours to assist in
taking care of him. He has absconded since yesterday, but I was informed not
too long ago that he reported to a police station.” The spokesperson for the
Ogun State Police Command, Omolola Odutola, confirmed the incident, saying that
an investigation was ongoing into the incident.
It is distressing that an
innocent child lies in his grave at the moment due to the dysfunctionality of
his family and the depravity of his father. What makes this case so sad is that
the tragedy could have gone either way, with either the hapless child or his
mother getting killed following the suspect’s fit of anger. It is probably true
that the woman in this story isn’t a saint, but the point is that precipitate
violence is not the solution to any problem. Anger, as a proverb says, does not
beget good offspring. Anger is patently dangerous and no one who means to live
a peaceful life can allow himself/herself to be ruled by it. Even if your wife
had been deliberately offensive, why seek to batter her with a rod? Even if
issues cannot immediately be resolved diplomatically, there is the option of
leaving the homestead for a while and allowing the angry emotions to die down.
It is unfortunate that an innocent child who looked up to his father and mother
for care and nourishment is dead now, and will never be heard from again. And
in all probability, the suspect, who no doubt will be mourning the dead child
at the moment, now faces a hard time in the court of law. That is double jeopardy,
and it is self-crafted.
If human beings are unable
to control their anger, then there is little sense in rating them above
animals. The suspect in this case will never forget that he killed his own
child, and neither will the government and the larger society, all because he
allowed perverse emotions to gain control, being ruled by his muscles rather
than his brain. Again, as we have said time and again, crime can only fester
when there are no consequences. Had the suspect faced the wrath of the law
before now for his alleged wife battery, perhaps he would not now be facing a
murder charge. Wife batterers need a reset of their brains through the justice
system, not a smile and forgiveness without guarantees of changed behaviour.
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