ReviewsNetwork@LIB.NG | Pastor warns women against trying to ‘own’ their husbands as she narrates her visit to a psychiatric hospital

Main Message

Pastor Dolapo Adelakun shares a spiritual reflection urging women to find peace in God and love for themselves, rather than trying to "own" their husbands or other external things. She emphasizes that clinging to relationships or possessions can lead to emotional and mental breakdowns when those things are lost or shaken.

Her Experience

She recounts a visit to a psychiatric hospital where she observed:

·       The female ward was overcrowded, with women suffering from mental health issues largely tied to marital and family problems.

·       The male ward had only four patients, mostly due to drug use or job loss.

Spiritual Insight

She says the Holy Spirit taught her to only "own" two things:

·       Her faith in God

·       Her love for herself

Everything else, children, spouses, property, can be taken away, and relying on them for peace is risky.

Call to Action

She urges women to protect their mental health by anchoring themselves in internal assets like faith and self-love, rather than external relationships or possessions.

The comments reflect a mix of agreement, personal testimonies, skepticism, and debate about gender roles and emotional resilience.

Theological Angle: Faith, Ownership & Peace

Pastor Adelakun’s reflection is rooted in a Christian theology of detachment and spiritual anchoring:

• Divine Ownership: She emphasizes that everything belongs to God, children, spouses, possessions. This echoes biblical teachings like Psalm 24:1 (“The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it…”), suggesting that humans are stewards, not owners.
• Internal vs. External Assets: The Holy Spirit’s “lecture” to her draws a line between:
• Internal assets: Faith in God and love for oneself, eternal, unshakable.
• External assets: Relationships, wealth, status, temporary and vulnerable to loss.
• Peace Through Surrender: Her message aligns with Philippians 4:7, which speaks of “the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding.” She argues that peace comes not from controlling life’s variables but from surrendering them to God.
• Spiritual Warfare: She warns that the devil will “shake everything you are holding on to,” implying that spiritual resilience requires anchoring in God, not in worldly attachments.

This theology is both comforting and challenging, it invites believers to reframe their emotional investments and find stability in the divine rather than the domestic.

Reactions: Empathy, Testimony & Pushback

The comment section reveals a rich tapestry of responses:

Supportive & Affirming

• Many women resonate deeply, sharing personal stories of heartbreak, betrayal, and healing through faith.
• One commenter wrote: “I fell into depression. Again... and again. But God, God didn’t leave me there. He held me. And I survived.”
• Others praised the message as “very true,” “insightful,” and “spot on,” affirming the idea that peace must come from within.

 

• Reflective & Philosophical

• Some reflect on the fleeting nature of life and possessions: “We came with nothing… life always goes on, with or without anybody or anything.”
• Others highlight the emotional fragility of women and the depth of relational pain.

 

• Critical & Skeptical

• A few commenters challenge the narrative:
• Some accuse the post of misandry or gender bias, suggesting it unfairly blames men.
• Others question the accuracy of the psychiatric hospital anecdote, doubting that only four men were admitted.
• A handful mock the pastor’s fear upon entering the hospital, questioning her spiritual authority.

Gender Debate

• The post reignites debates about gender roles, emotional resilience, and relational expectations:
• Comments like “Women overrate themselves” and “The average Nigerian woman wants to control her husband” reflect societal tensions.
• Others defend women’s emotional depth and urge them to protect their mental health.

Last Line of Action

Pastor Adelakun’s message is more than a cautionary tale; it’s a spiritual manifesto for emotional survival. It challenges cultural norms around marriage and motherhood, urging women to reclaim their peace through divine intimacy and self-love.